BISHOPDALE SCHOOL GALA SPIRALS INTO CHAOS OVER COIN SHORTAGE

It turns out that running a school gala is a more sensitive operation than keeping a flock of sheep in line, and if you don’t believe me, just ask the denizens of Bishopdale, who were recently smacked in the face by a coin shortage of epic proportions. Parents at St. Mary's School gathered for the annual event only to discover that they were flush in pampering their offspring but utterly rooted when it came to cash.

"I’ve never seen Sheila turn so red, and she usually handles the sausage sizzle like a pro!" remarked Barry, a self-appointed gala expert. "Who knew $1 coins were the backbone of our civilised society? Bloody ridiculous!" In true Christchurch fashion, it could be noted that a shortage of coins during a school event was perhaps, in fact, more shocking than a roadside cone misplaced.

The ensuing melee resembled a chaotic rugby scrum as parents scrambled to barter for tokens with each other, offering up anything from homemade muffins to half-eaten packets of fish fingers. The very fabric of decorum was stretched as middle-class anxieties bubbled over – one mum nearly spat the dummy when she discovered she was short 50 cents for a spinning wheel ticket.

Constable Pearce, on patrol nearby, chimed in, "I've seen a few situations in my time, but I reckon this lot would give a few of my mates at the station a run for their money. And don’t even get me started on the traffic - the main road was a right mess!" With civilisation wobbling, it remains to be seen how many parents will recover from their first experience of ‘cash only’ chaos.