The Daily Yarn
WEDNESDAY, 27 MAY 2026 · National Edition · Aotearoa's Most Reliable Unreliable News
School Gate

TAKAPUNA PRIMARY BANS GLITTER AFTER ART CLASS INCIDENT DESCRIBED AS 'BIBLICAL'

Three weeks on, the staffroom carpet still sparkles. So does the principal.

A Takapuna primary school has banned glitter from all classrooms. One teacher described the incident, in writing, as "biblical".

The ban was announced in Friday's newsletter, between a netball draw and a head lice reminder. A single tub of fine craft glitter went over in the Year 3 wing. Cleaners have been in four times. The glitter remains.

Parent Priya Ellsmore, whose daughter was there, said the fallout had spread well beyond school. "It's in her hair. It's in the car seats. It's in the dog. My husband wore a navy suit into town and arrived looking like he'd been to a hen's do."

Another parent, Hamish Rutherford, raised it at the last PTA meeting and was told the matter was "closed pending review". "They've formed a sub-committee," he said. "For glitter. There's a Google Doc."

The principal told The Daily Yarn the ban was "permanent and non-negotiable". Craft would now use "dry pasta, like civilised people". Asked about the carpet, she said it was "with the board".

A Year 3 student, asked what actually happened, said only that it had been "the best day of school ever".
Report / Takedown
Enjoy the yarn? Follow us for more:

Like this yarn?

Get the best one every morning.

SATIRE — Everything on this site is fabricated for entertainment. Not real news.