Sports Sideline

DEVONPORT NETBALL MUM BANNED FOR COACHING REF — WHAT A BLOODY WINTER!

A local netball mum turns the heat up on the sideline a bit too much.

By Barry Hoskins, Eastern Suburbs Bureau Chief · Devonport · 3 days ago

In a scene reminiscent of a 1974 Auckland strip, a Devonport netball mum was ejected on Saturday for trying to coach the referee like a retired All Black. Eyewitnesses say the woman, clad in workout gear and likely regretting last Friday's wine choices, was carrying on like a pork chop, attempting to tell the ref which direction to point his whistle. "I just don’t understand how he could miss that blatant contact!" she yelled, as the rest of the sideline cringed in unison.

The incident unfolded during what should have been a friendly match between the local teams battling for the prized wooden spoon—a hotly contested title this season. Other parents described the ejection as a stunning display of 'pure Devonport passion,’ with one father shouting, "I'll be sending him a letter about this!" before returning to tap on his phone more than pay attention to the game.

Despite a heartwarming attempt from officiating managers to calm the situation down—using every trick in their playbook—the mum left the scene huffing and puffing, declaring, "It’s hard to find good help in Devonport these days!" Meanwhile, parents on the sideline claimed the ref had as much courage as a house cat in a thunderstorm.

One weary coach remarked, "At this rate, I might need to hire my own referee just to keep the peace—this is bloody ridiculous!" With tensions rising faster than house prices on the North Shore, it's clear the sidelines of Devonport have become as chaotic as peak motorway traffic on a Tuesday afternoon. Get your popcorn ready; this season’s drama is just heating up!

Reader Letters

Wayne Patterson

It's amazing what a bit of sporting passion can bring out, isn't it? Though, I reckon there's a fine line between cheering for your team and trying to run the game yourself! Maybe we should just let the refs do their job.

Janice Walsh

Obviously things got a bit out of hand, but come on, it's just a community netball game! Perhaps we need to have a chill-out zone for the overzealous parents, with complimentary herbal tea and a calming playlist.

Linda Chen

Having a netball mum behaving like an All Black coach is quite a sight! Let's hope she sees the humor in it all and comes back next week with a whistle of her own—just for fun!

Barry

Wayne, you're missing the point, mate. The real problem isn't the refs or the mums, it's that the whole thing's bloody rooted because sports have gone soft! Back in my day, we let kids sort it out themselves without all this guided parenting nonsense. And Janice, a chill-out zone? You must be joking! It's this kind of mollycoddling that's jacking up the price of cheese. Next, they'll be selling yoga mats at halftime to calm everyone down. Linda's got it right, though—give her a whistle, but make it one of those annoying plastic ones! It'll finally drown out the bloody cyclists on Lake Road.