Satire — not real news Submit a yarn
The Daily Yarn

Aotearoa's finest fabricated news

Community Quirks

DEVONPORT MAN REUNITED WITH LOST JANDAL AFTER FERRY-TERMINAL PRESSER

Left foot's been doing solo work for nine days. The right one's finally got backup.

A Devonport bloke held what he called an "emotional press conference" outside the ferry terminal on Wednesday to announce the return of his missing left jandal.

Owner Brendon Tuilagi, 44, said the jandal was a size 11 Havaiana, blue strap, worn down on the outside edge. It had last been seen near the Cheltenham Beach carpark on the long weekend. "Took it off to get sand out. Put it down. Looked up. Gone. I've been in one jandal since Saturday week, mate."

The jandal was found by a Bayswater woman, Cheryl Donnison, who spotted it wedged under a pōhutukawa root on the coastal walkway. "Recognised the wear pattern from the Facebook post. He'd put a ruler next to it in the photo. Bloody thorough."

Tuilagi called the press conference to thank Cheryl personally. Three neighbours turned up, plus a confused tourist and a bloke waiting for the 2.15 ferry. Tuilagi got briefly choked up. "Slid it on. Fit like it never left. Nine days of limping, done."

A Devonport Business Association spokesperson said the ferry forecourt was "not really our jurisdiction, but good on him."

Tuilagi has since superglued an AirTag to the strap. He's taking both jandals back to Cheltenham on Saturday.

Know someone this is about? Send it to them.

Spotted something like this in your area?

Send us a photo and a sentence. We'll write the article.

SUBMIT A YARN →

Free. Anonymous if you want. Takes 60 seconds.

Reader Letters

Garry (Halswell)

A whole press conference for a jandal? Back in my day, we walked barefoot on rocks and called it character building. Kids these days couldn't manage without their fancy foot bits.

DevonportDave

Well done Brendon! I live in Bayswater and Cheryl's a legend around here. Wish I'd have spotted it myself!

Margaret_F

Speaking of lost things, I spent all morning looking for my reading glasses only to find them on my head.

stearlycup

LOL! Who holds a press conference for a jandal? Next we'll have ribbon-cutting for sneakers!

islandinfo123

@stearlycup it's about the principle, mate. People need these weird little rituals. Better than a mundane Wednesday, eh?

Know someone this is about? Send it to them.

Report / Takedown

Like this yarn?

Get the best one every morning.

SATIRE — Everything on this site is fabricated for entertainment. Not real news.