The $9,000 lectern that's never been stood at
Nine grand of oak turned up in the semester break and not one councillor has stood behind it.
Dave the Tradie
Dave left the tools ten years ago but never left the site banter. He files Tradie Tales from a ute that may or may not pass its WOF.
Burnside resident channels Poirot over mysterious courgette deliveries
Three weeks, forty courgettes, one determined detective. The basket remains off-limits.
Foxton plumber's key change ends Roslyn karaoke night after 11 years
The light fitting came down on the second chorus. The ban came down Tuesday.
Greytown cat caught opening neighbour's garage door on camera — installer says door is "working perfectly"
The door's under warranty. The cat isn't.
Glenholme man hoses driveway every night of hose ban — says it's "for morale"
The driveway is concrete. The concrete is fine. The bloke is from Palmerston North, which he reckons explains a lot.
Picton road cones now outnumber residents two to one — Marlborough district council "comfortable with the ratio"
Roughly 9,000 cones, 4,500 people, and one bloke actually holding a shovel.
Hoon Hay man furious Ponsonby cat elected Mayor before his own council fixes the bloody footpath
Facebook poll declares a ginger tom the winner. Meanwhile, Worsleys Road still has cones from June.
Roslyn woman's lost jandal returned from Auckland after 8 months, press conference held on lawn
The jandal, a size 8 Havaiana, was last seen at a barbecue in February.
St Andrews mum brings measuring tape to school pickup and won't let it go
She's measured the yellow lines. She's measured the Prados. Nobody asked her to.
Richmond Woolworths self-checkout asks customer if she's "okay" after failing to scan a cucumber
The machine wanted a chat. Sharon wanted a cucumber. Neither got what they came for.
Guys. I never thought I'd have to make this article: Te Anau woman's one grape arrives in fridge-sized box
Dave the Tradie sits down, takes a breath, and owns his truth about a Woolworths click-and-collect gone wrong.
Merivale weather app insists it's sunny while antarctica visibly approaches from the south
Little sun icon smiling away. Meanwhile the flag outside Ballantynes is doing a full horizontal.
Brockville community garden at war over whether kale was planted as a joke
Half the plot reckons it's dinner. The other half reckons it's a piss-take that got out of hand.
Tamahere time capsule cracked open 17 years early after council loses the bloody key
Sealed in 2008 for a 2050 reveal. Opened Tuesday with an angle grinder because someone lost the key.
Redwood family's Sumner beach day lasts 20 minutes, nor'wester blamed
Chilly bin packed, togs on, kids in the car. Weather had other ideas.
Redwood school lollipop lady runs crossing tighter than a bloody airport
Parents at Redwood Primary say Beverley's 3pm shift has cut wait times in half and grown men in utes to tears.
Hamilton dog park stalled by submission from a cat named Derek
One cat. One typed letter. Six months of meetings. Ratepayers footing the bill.
Taradale pump prints receipt longer than the bloke buying the fuel
Forty-two bucks of 91. Three metres of paper. One sparky ropeable.
Lyttelton weather app insists it's sunny as southerly takes bloke's gazebo
MetService widget says 14 and clear. The gazebo is now in Diamond Harbour.
Greytown commuter's chip butty taken clean out of hand by seagull with "no regard for the queue"
Bloke reckons the bird made eye contact first. The bird has not been available for comment.