FLAT BUSH MAN HOLDS PRESS CONFERENCE FOR LOST JANDAL — JANDAL ATTENDS
Six weeks apart. Twelve minutes of prepared remarks. One chewed left foot.
A Flat Bush man held a press conference at his front gate on Sunday to mark the return of a jandal, missing since early October, which was pulled out of a stormwater drain on Ormiston Road.
Owner Tomasi Faleolo, 34, stood at a folding table with the jandal on a tea towel and read from notes on his phone. "I want to thank everyone who shared the post," he said. "I want to thank the contractor who found it. I want to thank my wife, who told me to let it go, and was wrong."
The jandal, a Havaianas left foot in navy, went missing during "a bit of a moment" at Barry Curtis Park. Faleolo's wife Mareta attended under duress. "He printed an agenda," she told The Daily Yarn. "Three items. One of them was 'closing remarks'."
A neighbour who'd come over thinking someone had died stayed for the savouries. "Sausage rolls were good," she said. "Bit much for a jandal. But the sausage rolls were good."
Auckland Council, asked whether stormwater drains were a recognised venue for footwear recovery, said drains were "not designed for jandals" but conceded they often contained them. The right jandal is still missing.
A second press conference has been pencilled in for if it turns up.
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Reader Letters
Trev_Hornby
Only in Auckland! This is the height of absurdity. Holding a press conference for a lost jandal? What's next, a memorial service for a misplaced sock? Some people have too much time on their hands.
UniMate
@Trev_Hornby calling it absurd just shows you haven't felt the dread of misplacing a jandal during O-Week. We all need some levity these days!
mateoflostshoes
Tomasi is a bloody legend. We should all be this committed to finding what we've lost. I'd do the same for my left shoe too. Lose one jandal and you're stuck with a useless pair.
flatbush_fred
Stop the bloody presses!
conspiracist_kiwi
The left jandal is just a decoy. They're distracting us from what's really going down with those stormwater drains. This is all part of a government cover-up, mate. Wake up, sheeple!
munted_kiwi
Did anyone find Geoff? That's the real question here.
LindaTheLocal
Mate, printing an agenda for a jandal press conference is peak commitment. Love it.
Concerned_Jane
Auckland Council cannot be serious. How many jandals have been lost to stormwater drains under their watch?!