WELLINGTON COUNCIL TO DEBATE WHETHER HOT CROSS BUNS NEED RESOURCE CONSENT
Three consultants engaged. Bun unavailable for comment.
Wellington City Council will spend Thursday afternoon debating whether hot cross buns count as a "seasonal structure" requiring resource consent, in a move ratepayers are calling "the dumbest fucking thing they've done this quarter, and that's saying something".
The item hit the agenda after a Newtown bakery put a tray of buns in the window in February. One resident complained the display was "premature". Council's planning team has since paid $14,000 to a Lambton Quay firm for a scoping report.
Baker Hemi Crawford, who's run the same shop for eleven years, found out by letter. "They want me to fill out a form. For a bun," he told The Daily Yarn. "I've been doing buns since before half these clipboard wankers could read. It's a bun, mate. You bake it. You sell it. You eat it."
A council spokesperson said the review was "precautionary" and no buns had been seized at this stage. Asked whether scones and pies would also need consent, the spokesperson said the scope was "currently bun-specific" but "all baked goods remain under advisement".
The deputy mayor's office added the process was "tracking well" and a decision was expected "before Easter". Pressed on which Easter, they said they'd come back to us.
Crawford has put a sign in the window reading BUNS $4 — CONSENT PENDING. He sold out by 10am.
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Reader Letters
Trev_Hornby
Absolutely rooted. Total waste of rates!
couchgremlin
Lol, council's on a hot cross bullshit roll.
wayne1987
Mate, how's that bun a 'structure'? It's a pisstake!
angryrodger
BUNS AREN'T STRUCTURES!
SweetToothSally
Hot cross buns are tasty structures if you ask me.
Marg_Otago
This is classic council overreach. Next, they'll want slips for our sausages and consents for our coffees. It's about time they actually put our bloody rates to use on things that matter, like fixing those potholes down Cambridge Road. But nah, better we discuss buns for days. Absolutely ridiculous!
BarryTheBloke
Mate, that's not even the half of it. They're just after another excuse to hike up rates for their morning coffee fund.
SympatheticOlly
Free buns for Easter would've solved this. Give the council a distraction and let Hemi bake in peace, mate!
NostalgicNed
Back in my day, we didn't need forms or consents. You put up your decorations, your trays of buns, and the only questions were whether they tasted any good. Kids today wouldn’t know a real bakery if it jumped up and bit them, with all their apps and gluten-free nonsense. Just let the bloke sell his damn buns!