NGONGOTAHA UNDER-11 CRICKET HALTED 22 MINUTES BY LAB NAMED BISCUIT

A junior cricket match at the Ngongotaha Domain was suspended for twenty-two minutes on Saturday after a labrador named Biscuit walked onto the pitch in the third over and lay down on a length.

The umpire, a Year 12 from the senior club doing it for ten bucks and a sausage, called dead ball and waited. Biscuit did not wait. Biscuit rolled onto his back.

"Get the fucking dog off, mate, my boy's facing," shouted a father from the boundary, who gave his name only as Wayne and was wearing jandals in the rain. "Twenty-two minutes. I've timed it. I've fucking timed it."

Biscuit's owner, a woman walking the Te Ngae loop, said the dog had "never done this before" and was "normally good with sport". Asked whether the lead had been on at any point, she said the lead was "more of a suggestion".

The opposing coach said the delay was "the most cricket that happened all morning" and that his bowler had gone off the boil. Club officials confirmed Biscuit was removed using a saveloy from the canteen. No compensation overs were awarded.

Wayne is understood to be drafting a letter. Reminded me of the summer of '74, when a goat got on the wicket at Western Heights and nobody carried on like a pork chop — they just kept bowling.