WAIHEKE UNDER-11S SAUSAGE SIZZLE TRIGGERS LIBRARY ALARM, EVACUATES SIX ADULTS AND A CAT
The onions were on. The librarian was not having it. The ref blew full-time from the car park.
A sideline BBQ at an under-11s football match on Waiheke Island evacuated the neighbouring library on Saturday morning after the onions on the hotplate set off the smoke alarm through an open back window.
The barbecue, run by a Green Team dad known to everyone as Macca, had been going for about eleven minutes when the alarm started screaming next door. Six adults, one work experience kid, and the library cat were shepherded onto the footpath while Macca kept flipping.
"Mate, the sausages were on the turn," Macca told The Daily Yarn, tongs still in hand. "I'm not walking away from twenty snarlers for a fucking beeping. Library can shut a window."
The librarian, Prue Halloran, said she'd asked "nicely, then less nicely" for the hotplate to be moved further down the reserve. "I've got a toddler group at ten. I've got a bloke doing his tax returns at the big table. Now I've got the whole lot on the kerb watching a man in Crocs commit arson-adjacent behaviour."
The ref, a 19-year-old from Ostend, abandoned the match in the 38th minute after a Blue Team dad told him to "get fucked, you absolute tosser" over a throw-in decision, then wandered off toward the sausages. Fire and Emergency attended, confirmed there was no fire, and left with two onion ones and a Coke Zero.
Macca is back on the hotplate next Saturday. The library is closing early.
Know someone this is about? Send it to them.
Spotted something like this in your area?
Send us a photo and a sentence. We'll write the article.
SUBMIT A YARN →Free. Anonymous if you want. Takes 60 seconds.
Read next
More from Sports Sideline →SPREYDON UNDER-11 RUGBY MATCH STOPPED THREE TIMES IN TWENTY MINUTES — PLANE, COW, JANDAL
Ref blew the whistle for a Cessna. Then a heifer. Then a jandal. Parents lost the plot.
MAIREHAU UNDER-11 CRICKET MATCH ABANDONED AFTER LABRADOODLE REFUSES TO LEAVE PITCH FOR 40 MINUTES
The dog fielded better than half the slip cordon, according to one dad.
MOUNT VIC TOUCH MODULE ADOPTS MOSGIEL'S SARCASM SIN BIN — FIRST OFFENDER LASTED FOUR MINUTES
A public servant told the ref "oh mate, GREAT call" and was in the bin before the restart.
BISHOPDALE TOUCH GAME CALLED OFF AFTER DAD'S VAPE CLOUD SWALLOWS HALFWAY LINE
Ref couldn't see the ball. Ref couldn't see the players. Ref could smell blue raspberry from thirty metres.
ATAWHAI UNDER-11 SAUSAGE SIZZLE SETS OFF LIBRARY SMOKE ALARM, EVACUATES BOOK CLUB
The onions were browning. So, briefly, was the non-fiction section.
TAURANGA UNDER-15 NETBALL TEAM ENDS UP IN EASTBOURNE AFTER GPS BOOKS THEM ON A FERRY THAT DOESN'T EXIST
Coach reckons the app was confident about the 8.15am sailing. There is no 8.15am sailing.
Reader Letters
Trev_Hornby
Safer than Rotorua footpaths!
Jojo_Birch
Mate, it's a sausage sizzle, not a bloody crime scene. People need to chill out. If I had a dollar for every time I set the smoke alarm off at home, I'd be richer than the local council tradie.
softly_sceptical
Honestly, closing the library early just because of a little smoke? Bit soft, isn't it? Shows where our priorities are these days.
Robin63
Prue should lighten up! It’s just all part of the island flavour. Sorry to the cat, though.
garry_from_ponsonby
Mate, the real crime is those Crocs. At least throw some Jandals on.
wayne1987
Typical Waiheke—everything's a drama! Next thing you know, they'll declare a state of emergency over a burnt piece of toast.
maddie.simpson
@wayne1987 imagine if they ran out of snarlers when the firefighters came!