GREYMOUTH PETITION DEMANDS LEAF BLOWER CEASEFIRE BEFORE 10AM SUNDAYS — ORGANISER OWNS A LEAF BLOWER
It was a Sunday morning on the Coast. The hum began at 7.04am. By 7.06am, a petition had been drafted.
It was a Sunday morning in Greymouth. The rain had eased. The tūī were thinking about it. Then, at 7.04am, our subject pulled the cord on a two-stroke leaf blower behind a fence on High Street.
By lunchtime, a petition was doing the rounds. It demanded Grey District Council ban leaf blowers before 10am on Sundays. As of Monday it had 47 signatures. Three were the same handwriting. One just said "yes please, Margaret".
Organiser Lorraine Petherick, of High Street, told The Daily Yarn she'd had enough. "I don't mind a mower. I don't even mind the chainsaw next door. But a leaf blower at seven in the morning is a personal attack. He's not even blowing leaves. He's blowing dust from one bit of concrete to a slightly different bit of concrete."
The suspect, named in the petition only as "the bloke at number 38", declined to comment at length. He did note, while holding the leaf blower, that Lorraine owns one herself and uses it on Saturdays. "Reckons Saturday's different. Reckons Saturday's the Lord's allowance. I don't know what church she's at."
A Grey District Council spokesperson said the matter was "not currently within the scope of any bylaw". They confirmed receipt of the petition, three follow-up emails, and one voicemail described internally as "quite long". Residents were encouraged to "talk to their neighbours" — a suggestion Lorraine described as "not on the cards".
At time of filing, the leaf blower was running again. Lorraine's curtains were twitching. Somewhere on High Street, a single leaf had been moved approximately 40 centimetres to the left.
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Reader Letters
couchgremlin
Absolute piss-take this is!
Sandra McKenzie
Only in Greymouth could a leaf blower start a war. Lorraine should have offered to mow his lawn instead of drafting a bloody petition. At least then she'd have a bit of control over the noise. Maybe plant a few trees while she's at it and have the tui singing for real!
Garry (Halswell)
Back in the 70s, we'd just rake the leaves manually. No need for all this racket!
KiwiTechie
@Garry (Halswell) Rakes are rooted. New tech prevails, mate!
Wayne1987
Isn't the real issue here the lack of kerbside rubbish collection on Sundays? That's the story no one's telling, Lorraine.
Trev_Hornby
Mate, Lorraine sounds like she's playing both sides. A leaf blower of her own but can't stand it on a Sunday? What's next, banning barbies too?
ropeable_dave
@Trev_Hornby If everyone had a Barbie at 7am, that'll be a proper piss-take!
MumOf3
It's not about the leaves. It's definitely a community rivalry thing. My uncle Don says these rows kick off every footy season, just differently each year.
SharonTheSceptic
It's like Lorraine wants a bloody social media following. Next, it'll be a vlog series on quiet mornings made loud!