GRASMERE CAT NAMED 'PERSON OF INTEREST' ON NEIGHBOURLY POLL, LEADING BY 31 VOTES
Ginger tom Mervyn is beating an actual human suspect 43 to 12. The human is furious.
A ginger tom named Mervyn has been listed as a 'person of interest' on a Grasmere Neighbourly poll. The poll is about who's tipping recycling bins on Layard Street. He is winning by 31 votes.
Resident Coralie Ferngrove set it up after her yellow-lid went over for the third Tuesday running. Four options were neighbours. The fifth was Mervyn. Mervyn is well clear.
"I put him on as a laugh," Ferngrove told The Daily Yarn, next to a bin that was, at time of interview, on its side. "Now half the street reckons it's actually him. He's six kilos. He couldn't tip a shoebox."
Mervyn's owner, Bruce Tarelton of two doors down, said he was considering legal advice. "He's an indoor cat after 6pm. He's on the couch with me watching Country Calendar. This is a stitch-up by people too lazy to check their own possums."
The human in second place is a bloke called Nigel who parks a Hilux on the verge. Nigel said he was 'not thrilled' to be losing to a cat. Asked if he'd tipped any bins himself, Nigel said he had to go.
Mervyn was located during reporting, asleep on a heat pump. The bins went over again Wednesday night. Mervyn was, per Bruce, on the couch.
Know someone this is about? Send it to them.
Spotted something like this in your area?
Send us a photo and a sentence. We'll write the article.
SUBMIT A YARN →Free. Anonymous if you want. Takes 60 seconds.
Read next
More from Suburban Crime →AUCKLAND PARKING WARDEN TICKETS MOBILITY SCOOTER OUTSIDE HAWTHORNDALE DAIRY, IS 1,400KM FROM JURISDICTION
The scooter was parked. The warden was lost. The ticket is still on the handlebars.
CLIVE FENCE PAINTED WRONG SHADE OF CREAM PROMPTS FORMAL MEDIATION AT COMMUNITY HALL
Complainant reckons it's custard. Respondent reckons it's bone. Mediator brought biscuits.
AUCKLAND PARKING WARDEN TICKETS MOBILITY SCOOTER OUTSIDE FITZROY DAIRY
The warden was on holiday. He brought the ticket book.
WHITBY WHEELIE BIN LEFT OPEN OVERNIGHT — STREET GROUP CHAT NOW AT 340 MESSAGES
One resident called the sight 'confronting'. Another has offered to draft a bylaw.
LINWOOD CAT NAMED 'PERSON OF INTEREST' IN NEIGHBOURLY POLL, DECLINES TO COMMENT
The cat, known to the street as Mr Whiskerston, has received 43 of 61 votes and is currently asleep on a Corolla.
WAINONI GNOME CUSTODY BATTLE ENTERS THIRD WEEK, TWO HENDERSON FAMILIES REFUSE TO SPEAK AT LETTERBOX
Keith the gnome has been photographed on both lawns. Neither Henderson will say who moved him last.
Reader Letters
Trev_Hornby
Classic Invercargill. Only here would a cat be a 'suspect'.
Katie_NZ
Lol
PossumHunter123
Trev_Hornby mate, you do realise the ginger menace could be just a diversion from a possum parade?
OldKen1960
Back in my day, the worst thing on the street was a wandering sheep, not bloody bins! The younger generation has no idea how to manage community issues without dragging animals into politics. It's absurd the lengths we have to go these days to address simple problems. Once, we had a rogue duck in the garden—sorted it out with a tiny fence. No need for public polls. I reckon there's something fishy going on with these voting numbers too. Easy to blame Mervyn, but maybe it's just a matter of getting better bin lids!
Sandra_K
Why does everything become a piss-take? Poor Mervyn!
WayneConspiracy
Mate, cats can't tip bins. It's a government distraction!
Doubtful_Doreen
WayneConspiracy mate, that's not how bins or cats work!
couchgremlin
Mervyn must be strong to knock over a bin, eh?