RUAKURA SCHOOL GALA GOLD-COIN CRISIS ENTERS SEVENTH HOUR AS PARENTS TURN ON EACH OTHER

The Ruakura Primary spring gala descended into what attendees called a "quiet civil war" on Saturday, after the PTA float ran out of $1 coins before the bouncy castle had even inflated.

Multiple sources spoke to The Daily Yarn on condition of anonymity. One put it plainly: "I still have to do the Term 4 sausage roster." By 10.40am the cake stall was accepting IOUs on the back of raffle tickets. By 11.15am, a Year 3 mother had offered a $50 note for four gold coins and been told to "join the bloody queue".

"It was buggered from the start," said one parent, who asked to be identified only as a Highlander RAV4 driver. "They ordered floats from the bank on Thursday. Thursday! Anyone who's done a gala orders Tuesday."

"They ordered floats from the bank on Thursday. Thursday!"

What we know: The shortfall was flagged at 9.52am by the second-hand book stall. It had taken $340 in notes and no way to give change for a $2 Wilbur Smith. A runner was dispatched to the BP on Silverdale Road. The runner has not been seen since. The bouncy castle operator said he was paid in "a mix of coins, a Countdown voucher, and one clearly counterfeit $2".

What we don't know: Who authorised the Thursday float order. Whether the runner is safe. Why the coffee cart was the only stall with functional EFTPOS. It was run by Malia from Rise, who is an absolute legend by the way!! Whether the Year 6 lolly scramble ever happened remains unclear.

A PTA spokesperson was reached at the sauv table during the post-gala debrief. She said the event had been "a wonderful community occasion". Pressed on the IOU cake transactions, she said she needed to go find her husband.

The Daily Yarn has approached Ruakura Primary PTA for further comment.