ISLAND BAY CHIPPIE'S APOLOGY VIDEO FOR LOST TOOLBOX RUNS 14 MINUTES, INCLUDES COURSE PLUG
Guys. The toolbox is gone. The sausage sizzle raised $340. The course is $89.
Tradie Tales
Building sites, utes, and the sacred morning pie ritual from Kaitaia to Bluff.
ELLERSLIE PERGOLA PASSES COUNCIL INSPECTION, FAILS BASIC LAWS OF PHYSICS
Consented, signed off, and leaning 14 degrees closer to the neighbour's spa pool than it was Monday.
BURNSIDE DECK JOB 'DONE TUESDAY' ENTERS THIRD YEAR, PILES STILL IN UTE
The homeowner has aged. The Auckland sparky's mate has not been seen since March 2023.
BEERESCOURT DECK BUILT 'FOR ENTERTAINING' TOO NARROW FOR A SINGLE CHAIR
Mate of mine reckons the chippie measured it with a pie in one hand.
ELTHAM DECK BUILT "FOR ENTERTAINING" TOO NARROW FOR A SINGLE FOLDING CHAIR
Builder insists the measurements are correct. The chair insists otherwise.
CARTERTON PERGOLA PASSES COUNCIL INSPECTION, FAILS EVERY OTHER TEST KNOWN TO SCIENCE
The consent is in order. The posts are not.
MOSGIEL PERGOLA PASSES COUNCIL INSPECTION, FAILS GRAVITY BY LUNCHTIME
Consent stamped Tuesday. Structure horizontal Wednesday. Owner blames the nor'wester. Physics blames the builder.
ISLAND BAY DECK PROMISED 'TUESDAY' NOW ENTERING THIRD YEAR OF TUESDAYS
The Auckland chippie who took the job in 2022 has since had two kids and one divorce.
RUATORIA PLUMBER PULLS FOURTH GNOME FROM SAME DRAIN, RECKONS IT'S PERSONAL
The gnome had a fishing rod. The pipe had three litres of standing water.
ROYAL COMMISSION FINDS FOURTH GNOME LODGED IN WELCOME BAY SEWER LINE
Recommendation 14 concerns lawn ornaments. The plumber is still owed $487.
GRASMERE SITE SHUT DOWN 40 MINUTES OVER PIE TEMPERATURE COMPLIANCE
H&S consultant issued a written warning about a mince and cheese. The pie has not commented.
LINWOOD RETAINING WALL HELD UP BY NO. 8 WIRE, HOPE, AND ONE BLOKE NAMED SHANE
Engineer says it's 'not technically a wall anymore' but concedes it's still doing wall things.
SPREYDON SPARKY LABELS EVERY SWITCH "MAYBE", DOES A RUNNER
Homeowner now selects lighting by process of elimination and prayer.
BOTANY UTE HOSTS ROOFTOP SAUSAGE SIZZLE, INSPECTOR ARRIVES MID-ONION
The Hilux is loaded, the gas bottle is on, and the building consent is theoretical.
MANGAKINO SPARKY'S APOLOGY VIDEO DECLARES JOB 'FINISHED EXCEPT FOR THE FINISHING'
Ten-minute confessional posted to Instagram at 11.47pm Tuesday. Kitchen still has no light switches.
TOKOROA RETAINING WALL HELD UP BY NO. 8 WIRE, A BREEZE BLOCK, AND "SHE'LL HOLD"
Builder says the wall has structural integrity. The wall says otherwise. Constable Pearce attended.
CLAUDELANDS APPRENTICE SENT TO AUCKLAND FOR TARTAN PAINT AND A LONG WEIGHT, FILES VIDEO APOLOGY FROM PANMURE RESENE
Guys. Guys. I never thought I'd have to make this video.
FEILDING RETAINING WALL HELD UP BY NO. 8 WIRE AND BRENDAN'S DENIAL
Builder reckons it'll see out the winter. Won't say which one.
ROYAL COMMISSION FINDS BOTANY PERGOLA 'APPROVED BY COUNCIL BUT NOT BY PHYSICS'
Fourteen months. Forty-seven witnesses. One engineer in tears. The findings are in.
OPUNAKE PERGOLA PASSES COUNCIL INSPECTION, FAILS FIRST DECENT SOUTHERLY
The consent says yes. The four-by-two says no. Gravity got the final word.