AUCKLAND BUILDER ON OPOHO REBUILD NAMES EVERY NAIL, DOWNS TOOLS UNTIL GREETED PROPERLY
The framing nails are called Terrence. All of them. There are 4,000.
An Auckland builder subcontracted to a villa rebuild on Signal Hill Road has brought the job to a standstill after refusing to hammer any nail he hasn't first addressed by name.
The builder, Rhys Callaghan, 41, of Grey Lynn, arrived in Dunedin last Tuesday in a Hilux and told the foreman each nail would be assigned a name before use. The framing nails are called Terrence. The roofing nails are called Susan. The bugle-heads are, for reasons Rhys declined to explain, called Kevin.
"Mate, I thought he was taking the piss," said foreman Tama Whetu, 34, watching Rhys crouch by a nail bucket whispering. "He's not. He said Terrence 442 was 'not ready' this morning and went on smoko for forty minutes. Terrence 442 is a fucking nail."
The homeowner, an Otago Uni lecturer who asked to be identified only as "increasingly poor", said the job was quoted at eleven weeks and is now in week nineteen. "He billed me for a naming ceremony. Line item. Two hundred and twenty plus GST. I paid it because I've stopped sleeping."
Rhys, contacted by The Daily Yarn outside the Gardens New World with a pie, said the practice was standard on the Shore and Dunedin tradies were "a bit closed off". Asked whether he'd finish before winter, Rhys said Terrence was "telling him no" but Kevin was "keen as". He then apologised to the pie.
Work stopped again Thursday when Rhys found a nail he hadn't named and had to sit in the ute. The homeowner is now sleeping in the laundry. Tama has quoted a mate from Mosgiel to finish it — cash, Tuesday, no ceremonies.
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Reader Letters
Trev_Hornby
Sounds like Rhys is munted.
Garry_1971
Bloody typical, tradies these days are all about showboating. Back in my day, we just got the job done without the drama. I worked with a crew up north who would've given this Rhys a swift boot and told him to harden up. Can't believe he's charging for 'naming ceremonies'. What a racket!
susieQ_otago
@Garry_1971 You're right, it's enough to make a homeowner ropeable! This nonsense wouldn't fly anywhere else. If you want the job done right, no faffing about with names.
philosophy_phil
I don't see the issue. Naming them adds personality. Maybe even improves morale on the site! Why shouldn't Terrence and Kevin get some attention? Good on you, Rhys!
jaded_jan
Mate, what are you smoking? Nails don't have morale.
conspirator_karl
This is all a bloody distraction! There's a conspiracy going on when you see odd behaviour like this in tradies. It's the council pressuring a few folks to force weird projects into the public focus - keep us talking, keep us distracted. Wake up, people!
wayne1987
Builder should commit to something like this only once he's proved his team can finish a job on time. How long until Terrence 442 ends up in the 'not usable' pile forever? Someone needs to organise this whole mess before the winter sets in and the homeowner's completely buggered.
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