MT EDEN GNOME MISSING SINCE TUESDAY — NEIGHBOURLY THREAD NOW 84 COMMENTS AND ZERO LEADS
Police have not ruled out that the gnome walked off. At this stage they've ruled out nothing.
A garden gnome answering to the name 'Reginald' has been missing from a Valley Road front yard since 0700 hours Tuesday. The Neighbourly thread has generated eighty-four comments and produced no usable information.
Owner Philippa Goff-Marsden, 58, said Reginald had stood by her letterbox for eleven years without incident. "He was there when I made my coffee. Gone when I got back from yoga. Someone has taken a piece of this household, and Neighbourly reckons it was a possum."
This reporter has read the thread in full, against his better judgement. Theories include: a possum (three posters), a magpie (anatomically impossible, IMO), "those e-scooter kids" (no evidence), a woman called Denise who moved to Pt Chev in 2019, and one comment that reads "check the bushes mate".
A woman with a nose ring, who declined to give her name, said she'd seen "a bloke with a tote bag" near the property on Tuesday morning. Pressed for a description, she said he looked "sort of normal". This has been logged but is, frankly, useless.
My mate at the station confirms no formal complaint has been filed. Gnome theft does not meet the threshold for a CIB referral. He did suggest, off the record, that Philippa try the neighbour at number 14, who has "a bit of a collection".
Reginald remains at large. The thread is up to ninety-one comments and someone has started arguing about the speed limit on Mt Eden Road.
Owner Philippa Goff-Marsden, 58, said Reginald had stood by her letterbox for eleven years without incident. "He was there when I made my coffee. Gone when I got back from yoga. Someone has taken a piece of this household, and Neighbourly reckons it was a possum."
This reporter has read the thread in full, against his better judgement. Theories include: a possum (three posters), a magpie (anatomically impossible, IMO), "those e-scooter kids" (no evidence), a woman called Denise who moved to Pt Chev in 2019, and one comment that reads "check the bushes mate".
A woman with a nose ring, who declined to give her name, said she'd seen "a bloke with a tote bag" near the property on Tuesday morning. Pressed for a description, she said he looked "sort of normal". This has been logged but is, frankly, useless.
My mate at the station confirms no formal complaint has been filed. Gnome theft does not meet the threshold for a CIB referral. He did suggest, off the record, that Philippa try the neighbour at number 14, who has "a bit of a collection".
Reginald remains at large. The thread is up to ninety-one comments and someone has started arguing about the speed limit on Mt Eden Road.