ISLAND BAY CHIPPIE'S APOLOGY VIDEO FOR LOST TOOLBOX RUNS 14 MINUTES, INCLUDES COURSE PLUG
Guys. The toolbox is gone. The sausage sizzle raised $340. The course is $89.
Island Bay
Every yarn The Daily Yarn has filed from Island Bay — 12 yarns of invented local news, newest first. None of it happened.
ISLAND BAY DECK PROMISED 'TUESDAY' NOW ENTERING THIRD YEAR OF TUESDAYS
The Auckland chippie who took the job in 2022 has since had two kids and one divorce.
ISLAND BAY MAN INSTALLS FOUR CCTV CAMERAS TRAINED SOLELY ON HIS LETTERBOX
Front door, driveway, and shed remain, in his words, 'not the point'.
ISLAND BAY OP SHOP MUG PRICED AT $2 SELLS FOR $46 AFTER BIDDING WAR
The mug says 'World's Best Nan'. Neither bidder is a Nan.
ISLAND BAY WOOLWORTHS SELF-CHECKOUT ASKS CUSTOMER IF SHE'S 'OKAY TO CONTINUE'
The machine froze on a single kūmara. The customer froze on the existential question.
ISLAND BAY BATHROOM RENO STALLED 11 DAYS OVER WRONG SHADE OF WHITE
The tiler is parked on The Parade eating his third pie. Nobody is showering.
ISLAND BAY MUM ENTERS PTA MEETING AT 6PM, STILL THERE AT MIDNIGHT WITH THERMOS HALF-FULL
The agenda had four items. She has tabled eleven.
ISLAND BAY UNDER-11 FOOTY BBQ SETS OFF LIBRARY SMOKE ALARM, EVACUATES STORY TIME
Twenty-two toddlers ushered onto The Parade clutching picture books. Coach Brent reckons the snarlers were 'just getting going'.
ISLAND BAY NOTE-LEAVER ESCALATES TO LAMINATED A4 OVER SINGLE DOG TURD
Author signs off as 'A Concerned Neighbour' but everyone reckons it's the bloke at number 14.
ISLAND BAY JUNIOR FOOTBALL CALLED OFF AT 22 DEGREES — SAUSAGE SIZZLE PROCEEDS REGARDLESS
Wellington hit a temperature once experienced in Napier on a Tuesday. The under-11s were sent home. The Hellers were not.
ISLAND BAY WOMAN FINDS ONE SOCK ON THE PAVEMENT, STARTS SUPPORT GROUP BY TUESDAY
The sock is grey. The group has 34 members. The other sock is still missing.
WELLINGTON COUNCIL SPENDS THREE HOURS DEBATING WHETHER HOT CROSS BUNS NEED RESOURCE CONSENT
Two consultants engaged. One bun produced. Nobody has eaten it.