HAMILTON EAST PICNIC RELOCATED TO LOUNGE, THERMOSES NOW SEATED BY ALLEGIANCE
What began as a riverside gathering has become a silent standoff over who brought the better flask.
Weather Watch
Hyper-local weather panic — each region has its own weather identity.
NEWTOWN DROUGHT DECLARED OVER AFTER DRIZZLE SPOTTED ON RENAULT WINDSCREEN
Three weeks of dire warnings undone by what one witness called 'barely a spit, honestly'.
METSERVICE INSISTS LINWOOD IS "FINE AND SUNNY" AS RESIDENTS WATCH ICEBERG DRIFT PAST NEW WORLD
The app shows a smiling sun. The wheelie bins are sideways. Something has to give.
GLADSTONE UMBRELLA LASTS SEVEN SECONDS, OWNER BLAMES CLIMATE CHANGE AND ALSO HIS WIFE
The umbrella was new. It is now a sculpture.
BISHOPDALE GRITTED AT DAWN AFTER RESIDENT REPORTS "BIT OF A NIP" IN THE AIR
Tuesday's low of 8.4 degrees prompted full winter response from Christchurch City Council.
TAKAPUNA OFFICE SPLIT DOWN THE MIDDLE OVER WHETHER 18 DEGREES IS A PUFFER JACKET SITUATION
Three staff are in merino. Two are in puffers. One bloke is in jandals. HR has been called.
ROSLYN BLOKE HOSES DRY DRIVEWAY DURING HOSE BAN, CITES "MORALE"
Council says no. The driveway has never looked cleaner.
TARADALE BRACES FOR SNOW THAT HAS NEVER, IN RECORDED HISTORY, ARRIVED
MetService mentioned the word once. Pak'nSave is out of bread by 9am.
PAPAMOA MAN THIRD-DEGREE CRISPY AFTER FORGETTING SUN STILL WORKS IN SEPTEMBER
It was 19 degrees. He was outside forty minutes. He is now the colour of a chorizo.
METSERVICE PROMISES SUNNY DEVONPORT, ONE CLOUD DIDN'T GET THE MEMO
Forecast said fine. The sky above Cheltenham Road said otherwise.
TAKAPUNA BEACH DAY ENDS IN HORIZONTAL RAIN AFTER 11 MINUTES OF SUNSHINE
The sausages were still cold. The towels are now in the harbour.
ONERAHI DAIRY BECOMES UNOFFICIAL MET SERVICE AS CUSTOMERS REFUSE TO AGREE IT'S MUGGY
Three customers, one thermometer above the pie warmer, zero consensus.
NEWMARKET TRAMPOLINE FOUND IN REMUERA FRONT GARDEN, RESIDENTS DEMAND IT LEAVE
The wind giveth. Remuera would like it to taketh away again, ideally before the body corporate meeting.
KARORI HAIL THE SIZE OF "AGGRESSIVE PEAS" RUINS SMOKO, COUPLE OF UTES, AND DEREK'S MOOD
Bloke on a roof in Marsden Village reckons he copped one down the back of his hi-vis and that was the end of morning tea.
HENDERSON COUNTDOWN OUT OF BREAD BY 4PM AFTER FORECAST SAYS THE F-WORD
MetService mentioned frost. West Auckland responded like the power was about to go out for a fortnight.
MOSGIEL BLOKE RECKONS THE WIND HAS IT IN FOR HIM SPECIFICALLY
Wheelie bin last seen heading for Outram at pace. Owner not invited.
STOKE FOG TURNS SCHOOL RUN INTO 1940s DETECTIVE FILM, MUMS REPORTEDLY LOVING IT
Visibility down to about a Hilux length. One dad arrived at the wrong school entirely.
ISLAND BAY JUNIOR FOOTBALL CALLED OFF AT 22 DEGREES — SAUSAGE SIZZLE PROCEEDS REGARDLESS
Wellington hit a temperature once experienced in Napier on a Tuesday. The under-11s were sent home. The Hellers were not.
SUMNER HUMIDITY DECLARED 'HAIR HAZARD' AFTER THREE INCIDENTS ON THE ESPLANADE
One local's fringe reportedly took out a sunglasses display outside the dairy.
PONSONBY IN MELTDOWN AS HUMIDITY REACHES 78% — RESIDENTS DEMAND ANSWERS
Linen shirts limp. Sourdough won't rise. One woman blames the council.