ONERAHI EV CHARGERS INSTALLED IN PADDOCK NO CAR HAS EVER REACHED
Whangarei District Council confirms the two chargers are 'future-proofing' a gravel turnaround accessible only on foot.
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KARORI STREET AT WAR OVER MISSING GARDEN HOSE
Two factions, one cul-de-sac, zero hose. Police describe the situation as 'ongoing and frankly embarrassing'.
SUMNER DAIRY SELLS OUT OF HOT CHIPS DURING POWER CUT NOBODY CAN EXPLAIN
The fryer was off. The chips kept coming. Locals queued anyway.
PAPAMOA ROOFING CREW DOWNS TOOLS EVERY TIME A PLANE PASSES — CITES "SAFETY"
Tauranga Airport is 4km away. The crew has stopped work 38 times since Monday.
KARORI BUILDER INSISTS GAPING HOLE IN ROOF IS 'VENTILATION, BRO'
Homeowner asked for a re-roof. Got a skylight. Got a puddle. Got a lecture about airflow.
ROSLYN PUBLIC DUNNIES SHUT FOR 'WELLNESS REFURBISHMENT' — NO ONE KNOWS WHAT THAT MEANS
Palmerston North City Council promises 'a calmer toileting journey' by April. Locals just want a slash.
STOKE MAN ERECTS SIX-FOOT SCARECROW TO DETER U-TURNS, NEIGHBOURS NOW DOING U-TURNS TO LOOK AT IT
The scarecrow is wearing a hi-vis and Gerald's old fishing hat.
ROSLYN PUB PULLS PLUG ON KARAOKE AFTER POWER BALLAD 'INCIDENT'
Nobody's saying which song. Everyone knows which song.
LINWOOD SCARECROW NAMED BEST DRESSED AT AWARDS NIGHT THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN
The scarecrow is wearing a sash. Nobody can account for the sash.
TAKAPUNA MAN'S DAILY LOOP NOW HAS A BLOODY SHRINE — HE HASN'T NOTICED
Locals built a small altar on the corner of Hurstmere. Kevin walks past it twice a day without looking up.
STOKE FOG TURNS SCHOOL RUN INTO 1940s DETECTIVE FILM, MUMS REPORTEDLY LOVING IT
Visibility down to about a Hilux length. One dad arrived at the wrong school entirely.
NEWMARKET CROSSING WARDEN RUNS PICKUP LANE LIKE A PRISON YARD, PARENTS QUIETLY OBSESSED
She's stopped a Range Rover with one raised palm. The Range Rover apologised.
LINWOOD CYCLE LANE ENDS IN A HEDGE, COUNCIL CALLS IT "PHASE ONE"
Phase two was described as "in scoping" by someone who would not give their name.
ROSLYN MAILBOX TAGGED OVERNIGHT, POLICE BLAME 'YOUTHS' AND ONE POSSUM
The possum has not been named but is described as 'a known offender' by two neighbours.
STOKE DAD FILMING UNDER-11 FOOTY FOR "THE TRIBUNAL" — TRIBUNAL DOES NOT EXIST
He has 47 hours of footage. He has been told 31 times there is no tribunal.
BISHOPDALE CRICKET DAD DEMANDS UMPIRE MOVE THE SUN
Under-13 match held up 22 minutes while bloke explains astronomy to a teenager in a hat.
METSERVICE PROMISES SUNNY DEVONPORT, ONE CLOUD DIDN'T GET THE MEMO
Forecast said fine. The sky above Cheltenham Road said otherwise.
ONERAHI SCHOOL CAR PARK NOW OPERATING UNDER PEACEKEEPING ROSTER AT 3PM
Two mums haven't made eye contact since the term two bake sale. A third is mediating from a Hilux.
LINWOOD RETAIL PARK ONE-WAY SYSTEM CONFUSES SHOPPERS, STAFF, AND PERSON WHO DESIGNED IT
Six arrows. Three painted over. One Mitsubishi going the wrong way past Briscoes for the fourth time.
TARADALE SCAFFOLDERS ADD $400 'ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT' LINE TO QUOTE
The homeowner asked what it was for. The scaffolder charged him another twenty for asking.
SUMNER SPARKY'S TOOLBOX KNOCKED OFF FRIDAY — REPLACED BY SATURDAY VIA $4 SAUSAGES
The thieves got a Makita combo kit. The community got 380 onions through a Briscoes pan.
WELLINGTON COUNCIL PAYS CONSULTANTS $90K TO LOCATE THE CONSULTANTS
The consultants were, it turns out, on level four of the building the invoice came from.
LINWOOD FENCE PAINTED "COASTAL FOG" TRIGGERS FORMAL MEDIATION AT COMMUNITY HALL
The neighbour wanted Mist Grey. She got blue.
PAPAMOA UNDER-14 NETBALL BUS STRANDED AT FERRY TERMINAL AFTER GPS BACKS ITSELF
Driver insists the app said 'board vessel'. The vessel had left at 6.40am.
ISLAND BAY NOTE-LEAVER ESCALATES TO LAMINATED A4 OVER SINGLE DOG TURD
Author signs off as 'A Concerned Neighbour' but everyone reckons it's the bloke at number 14.
NEWTOWN PETITION TO BAN SUNDAY LEAF BLOWERS BEFORE 10AM HITS 400 SIGNATURES, NONE FROM THE BLOKE WITH THE BLOWER
Riddiford Street is at war with one man and a Stihl.
TAKAPUNA CAT FILMED OPERATING GARAGE DOOR, OWNER INSISTS HE'S "JUST A NORMAL BOY"
Footage shows the tabby standing on a recycling bin to press the button. Twice in one night.
INVERCARGILL MITRE 10 RETURNS DESK ACCEPTS BARBECUE STILL ACTIVELY ON FIRE
Customer cited 'change of heart'. Staff cited the smoke alarm.
NEWMARKET BUNNINGS SAUSAGE SIZZLE DESCENDS INTO ONION-PLACEMENT STANDOFF
Operator put the onions under the sausage. Customer put the onions on the ground. Then she put herself in his face.
PONSONBY PENSIONER ACCUSED OF SHOPLIFTING BY MACHINE THAT CAN'T TELL A CARROT FROM A PARSNIP
The Woolworths self-checkout flagged 82-year-old Eileen Brockett for 'suspicious bagging activity'. She had two onions and a Listener.