HILLMORTON GNOME VANISHES OVERNIGHT, NEIGHBOURLY POST YIELDS 47 THEORIES AND ZERO GNOMES
One suggested the gnome 'walked off of his own accord'. Another blamed the nor'wester. Nobody blamed the actual suspect, which was almost certainly a teenager.
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INGLEWOOD PRIMARY FLOGS WRAPPING PAPER AT $12 A ROLL, SIX ROLL MINIMUM
The PTA says it's for the pool. The pool has been getting a shade sail since 2019.
PAIHIA GNOME NAMED KEITH AT CENTRE OF HENDERSON-ON-HENDERSON DISPUTE, NEITHER HENDERSON RELATED
Both families produce receipts. Neither receipt is for Keith.
MANGAKINO SPARKY'S APOLOGY VIDEO DECLARES JOB 'FINISHED EXCEPT FOR THE FINISHING'
Ten-minute confessional posted to Instagram at 11.47pm Tuesday. Kitchen still has no light switches.
HUNTLY PUBLIC MEETING ON PROPOSED PIGEON STATUE ENDS WITH TWO RESIGNATIONS AND A THROWN SCONE
Waikato District Council wanted feedback on a $48,000 bronze pigeon. They got it.
ASHHURST SCHOOL BOARD MEETING ENTERS HOUR FOUR AS THERMOS PARENT REFUSES TO CEDE FLOOR
She brought soup. She brought printouts. The Chair brought regret.
MELVILLE GNOME VANISHES OVERNIGHT, NEIGHBOURLY THREAD HITS 147 REPLIES AND ZERO LEADS
Owner says the gnome, Reginald, had been on the front lawn since 2009. Theories include a possum, a magpie, and the bloke from number 42.
Atawhai Man's Kite Not UFO, Just Very Intense Flying
The kite has dangly bits. The wristwatch cost more than the kite. The wind does not care.
Sumner Street's Funky Hat Man Raises Eyebrows and Noise Levels
Wagner Place residents have lodged three noise complaints and one vibe complaint in a fortnight.
NEWFIELD DAIRY BECOMES MET SERVICE ANNEX AFTER FROST DEBATE TURNS PERSONAL
Two pensioners, one thermometer, and a packet of Pineapple Lumps held hostage for forty minutes.
New Plymouth's Unreadable Sign Leaves Locals Philosophically Challenged
It was a Tuesday morning on the coastal walkway. Nothing about that day suggested what was about to unfold.
Hamilton candidates indistinguishable in ring road trifecta of promises
Three mayoral candidates promise to fix the ring road. None of them define ring, road, or fix.
Tawa's Ogre Wedding: Nuns, Onion Tables, and Unsolved Mysteries
A Stuff investigation into the green-painted nuptials that have left a Tawa hall booking officer requesting a full carpet shampoo.
Local Spice Baron Welcomes Delivery as Nintendo Icon
Three Speights in at the Sumner pub when Macca tells me about Walter again. Mate, you won't believe this one.
Council Slow to Support After Cat Becomes Permanent Garden Fixture
The cat is fine. The silverbeet is not. The Dunedin City Council is, as ever, reviewing.
Tekapo's mystery boats spark 340-page inquiry, still unclaimed
The Commission finds, on the balance of probabilities, that the boats have been there since at least Queen's Birthday.
Redwood Ripper? Terrier Deflects Cardboard Chaos Blame
The bath was at 9.40. The cardboard was destroyed by 10.06. Police are not involved, but should be.
Ogre Mystifies Crofton Downs, Refuses to Move to Petone Swamps
Multiple sources confirm a large green figure has been loitering near the bush line. Officials remain tight-lipped.
Grey Lynn Water: A Dash of Chlorine, Anyone?
Sources allege Auckland Council has reversed the chlorine-to-water ratio. The Daily Yarn has spent six weeks investigating a glass of water.
Ashburton Dog's Bubble Tail Bewitches and Bewilders Locals
Local puppy's soap bubble tail threatens Ashburton's artisanal market economy.
Giant Nike Ball Smashes Ashburton Convertible in Fashion Fail
Enormous rogue ball brings new definition to 'car boot sale' on main street.
Te Awamutu Abuzz with 'King of Pop' Pharmacy Sighting
Pharmacy's beauty aisle host to a wave and a whisper of mystery and moisturiser.
Aro Valley Builders Enjoy Smoko Feast as Work Lags
Aro Valley site trades tools for pies — progress redefined.
Takapuna Schnauzer Leaves Rug in Dust During Epic Nap Battle
Owner says dog's a "real killer" despite snooze-heavy tactics.
Kiwi humour mishap: Browns Bay delivery van's awkward sign blunder
New World's delivery message prompts laughter over intended practicality.
WELLINGTON COUNCIL SPENDS TWO HOURS DEBATING WHETHER HOT CROSS BUNS NEED A RESOURCE CONSENT
The motion was tabled, untabled, then tabled again by a councillor who hadn't read it.
Jogger in Cashmere stirs online frenzy with unexpected route artwork
The route, three kilometres of poor decisions, has been described by the runner as 'a sunset loop'. It is not.
Parnell Pensioner Decries Whale Mural as 'A Bit Much'
Strongly-worded letter cites 'aquatic overreach' and the late Mr Pemberton's blood pressure.
MANUKAU WOOLWORTHS RETURNS DESK PRESENTED WITH BARBECUE STILL ON FIRE
Customer wants a refund. Customer also wants the sausages back.
SOLWAY MAILBOX TAGGED WITH WORD RESIDENTS WON'T REPEAT — POSSUM NAMED AS PERSON OF INTEREST
Three mailboxes hit overnight. Two say 'cooked'. One has paw prints.