Feilding man lodges formal complaint against the wind, alleges "personal vendetta"
Constable's note: the wind is not, at time of writing, a person under the Crimes Act 1961.
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Spreydon sparky labels every switch "maybe", does a runner
Homeowner now selects lighting by process of elimination and prayer.
Ahuriri netball mum ejected for coaching the ref every 12 seconds
The under-11 game was 40 minutes long. She lasted 14.
Ngaruawahia mum's driveway chalk drawing slapped with 'unlicensed road art' complaint
The road in question is a driveway. The art in question is a rainbow.
Linwood retaining wall held up by no. 8 wire, hope, and one bloke named Shane
Engineer says it's 'not technically a wall anymore' but concedes it's still doing wall things.
Levin school car park now a "diplomatic zone" at 3pm pickup
Two mums haven't spoken since a wing-mirror bump in April. A third is running peace talks via WhatsApp.
Crofton Downs reading log feud escalates to board of trustees, parents bring lever-arch folders
One family logged 47 minutes. Another logged 45. The board meets Thursday.
Carterton umbrella lasts eight seconds, owner blames climate change
You didn't hear it from me. Heard it off Kev at the Carterton Club, Thursday. Maybe Wednesday.
Washdyke picnic moved indoors as southerly hits, six thermoses spark lino standoff
Guys. Guys. I never thought I'd have to make this video about a Sunday picnic.
Paraparaumu petrol pump prints receipt longer than the driveway
Local motorist filled up 40 litres. Received 40 metres.
Christchurch council installs EV chargers on Southshore spit where no car has ever parked
Guys. Guys. I never thought I'd have to make this article. But here we are — four chargers, zero cars, one very confused seagull.
Redwood playground shut for 'aspirational maintenance' — nobody at council will say what that is
Christchurch City Council has closed a working slide behind orange netting for reasons nobody can define in under 400 words.
Queenstown pothole reported to Napier app by mistake, gets more sympathy than qldc has offered in a decade
Ratepayer meant to email QLDC. Ended up on a Hawke's Bay portal that at least had the decency to lie kindly.
Guys. I need to address the Mayor's DVD situation
Constable Dave Pearce sits down in front of the ring light to talk about accountability and $47.80 in library fines that quietly disappeared.
Grasmere site shut down 40 minutes over pie temperature compliance
H&S consultant issued a written warning about a mince and cheese. The pie has not commented.
Island Bay op shop mug priced at $2 sells for $46 after bidding war
The mug says 'World's Best Nan'. Neither bidder is a Nan.
Westshore dog poo note-leaver strikes 14th time, now laminating
The notes started in June. They are now laminated and cable-tied to fenceposts.
Linwood boat on blocks enters fourth year of 'heritage' defence, neighbours unconvinced
The vessel hasn't touched water since Muldoon was in charge. Its owner says that's the point.
Linwood scarecrow wins best dressed at awards night that never happened
The sash is real. The ceremony is not. Gavin is tied to a stake and cannot confirm either way.
Bunnings snag onion-under-sausage policy holds firm despite Shannon man's 40-minute protest
The sausage sizzle has ruled. The onion goes under. Ivan disagrees, at length, in the carpark.
Christchurch dog park stalled by written submission from one (1) cat
Council confirms the submission was signed with a paw print and lodged before the deadline.
Masterton Central man installs CCTV trained solely on letterbox, makes tearful apology video
Guys. Guys. I never thought I'd have to make this video.
Mount Wellington woman finds one sock, starts support group for others in same boat
First meeting Thursday at the community hall. BYO orphan sock and a plate.
Bromley fog so thick parent walks past own child at school gate
Visibility on Wednesday morning was described as 'about a metre, tops' by a woman who had already given up.
Tamahere wheelie bin lid left open — street group chat now 340 messages deep
One flap of plastic. Three days of accusations. A retired accountant has printed diagrams.
Rangiora's rebel sheep lands behind bars after rose rampage
Ewe number 447 was collected from a South Belt paddock on Tuesday. Nobody on the street will comment on the record.
Mapua footpath upgrade halted by one stroppy camellia
Tasman District Council spent $47,000 on a plan. The plan did not survive a shrub.
New Lynn woman convinced neighbour's solar panels are 'watching her hang the washing'
She's rotated the Hills hoist twice. The panels, she says, rotated with her.
Kmart Hamilton's 'treasure hunt' revealed to be staff simply losing things
Store insists misplaced stock is a 'family activity'. Shoppers reckon it's the same as every other Tuesday.
Dunedin city council shuts North Dunedin playground for 'aspirational maintenance' — no one can explain what that is
Sources who spoke to The Daily Yarn on condition of anonymity say the swings were 'basically fine, mate'.